Nobody wants a cold marriage! We all want a red hot relationship that has lots of passion, excitement, victories and good memories. Unfortunately, most marriages enjoy very little heat if any. From the onset, it is as if there is a set timer that works to gradually reduce the heat in marriage to a freezing point where divorce or a cold coexistence is all that remains of what was a fiery romance. A cold relationship is characterized by poor or no communication, sharing fewer interests, engage in sex less often, no intensity in disputes, reduced or no expectations, a dislike for previously enjoyed activities and much more.
If you have noted some or a lot of the characteristics mentioned above, your relationship is very likely dropping its temperature and you too could soon be freezing in a cold marriage. To avoid being in this unenviable position, you need to ensure that your relationship is always well fueled so as to deliver the much needed heat that will keep you marriage alive and healthy. Here are a few places and ways for you to refuel and ensure that the fire in your marriage keeps burning for as long as you both shall live.
Keep the fire burning in your marriage!
- God
Regardless of your religion or faith if you believe in God, then that should always be your first stop for refueling your marriage. Every religion has a very special place for marriage as this is the one institution sanctioned by God through his creation of man and woman. Whenever you go back to religious teachings, you will always find something to encourage, grow and sustain your relationship as a couple. God is the number one fuel that will keep your marriage propelled in the right direction while also providing sufficient heat for your journey of love. Engaging in prayers and other religious activities together will help you enjoy a warm, fulfilling and happy marriage.
- Play
If too much work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, imagine what happens when you multiply that by two! Too much work and no play will make Jack and Jill double dull! Marriage is nothing if it is not fun! Every so often, you and your partner need to look for a mutually enjoyable activity that you can engage in. As you play with your partner, you get to know each other better while also creating beautiful memories that will help carry you through the tough moments that will come in future. A camping trip, a night out dancing, travelling, a picnic or some other shared hobby are great ways for you and your spouse to enjoy each other’s company and ensure that the fire in your marriage never dies down.
- Give
Giving is one of the most powerful instruments that can bring fulfillment to a human being. Giving has been and continues to be an integral component of every race, religion, society and civilization. Those who give find greater meaning and fulfillment in life. As a couple, it is your duty to find a reason and season to give. Do not wait to have so that you can give but rather make a habit of giving what you have. When you share a positive and meaningful experience such as giving to someone who has greater need than yourself, you invoke the kindness of God upon your lives. For those who believe in karma, your actions of kindness will come back to you in greater kindness. As you share the experience of giving, it gives back to you and your spouse. You will grow closer, warmer and happier if you make giving a part of your marriage.
- Intimacy
Intimacy in marriage is the thermometer that gauges how cold or warm things are between a couple. It is a direct reflection of how hot or cold your relationship is at any given time. A healthy and mutually satisfying sex life is important for the life of a marriage. A marriage that lacks sex for extended durations without any serious or well understood reason is on its death bed. Even in the absence of sex intimacy can still be maintained through kissing and touching. The physical connection that comes from intimacy cannot be replaced with the provision of anything else such as presents, money or even words. Physical intimacy is critical to maintaining the correct relationship temperatures in your marriage.
- Adventure
Every so often, your relationship requires you to hit the refresh button and attempt old things in a new way or go for an entirely new thing in a new way. The thrill of the unknown is a limitless source of fuel for your marriage. By constantly trying new things you get to see your partner in a different light and get to know things about them that you would never have known if you did not try out something new and different. Your adventures can be applied in every aspect of your lives. You can relocate to a new place, try a new restaurant, experiment with new ideas in bed, look for new opportunities to give, change your dressing styles, attempt new feats and so much more. A marriage that embraces new ideas will have a constant supply of heat from the thrill and excitement of the adventures that the couple enjoys.
There are many other heat “sources” that you should look at when looking to keep your marriage as hot as possible. As you can see they do not require lots of money or time, they only need some creativity, will and determination. Do not let the fire die down in your marriage; it is easier to keep it burning rather than attempt to reignite it every time you realize that your relationship is getting cold. If you have other ideas on ways in which we can keep the fire burning in our marriages, please feel free to share them with us and we will be more than happy to try them out and see how they work.
Tighter with Taiti 